Thai Culture Guide >> Thai Marriage
Thai marriage ceremonies are generally divided into two
sections: a Buddhist component, which includes the recitation of prayers and the
offering of food and other gifts to monks and images of the Buddha, and a
non-Buddhist component rooted in folk traditions, which centers on the couple's
family.
In former times, it was unknown for Buddhist monks to be present at any stage of
the marriage ceremony itself. As monks were required to attend to the dead
during funerals, their presence at a marriage (which was associated with
fertility, and intended to produce children) was considered a bad omen. A couple
would seek a blessing from their local temple before or after being married, and
might consult a monk for astrological advice in setting an auspicious date for
the wedding. The non-Buddhist portions of the wedding would take place away from
the temple, and would often take place on a separate day.
In modern times, these prohibitions have been significantly relaxed. It is not
uncommon for a visit to a temple to be made on the same day as the non-Buddhist
portions of a wedding, or even for the wedding to take place within the temple.
While a division is still commonly observed between the "religious" and
"secular" portions of a wedding service, it may be as simple as the monks
present for the Buddhist ceremony departing to take lunch once their role is
complete.
During the Buddhist component of the wedding service, the couple first bow
before the image of the Buddha. They then recite certain basic Buddhist prayers
or chants (typically including taking the Three Refuges and the Five Precepts),
and light incense and candles before the image. The parents of the couple may
then be called upon to 'connect' them, by placing upon the heads of the bride
and groom twin loops of string or thread that link the couple together. The
couple may then make offerings of food, flowers, and medicine to the monks
present. Cash gifts (usually placed in an envelope) may also be presented to the
temple at this time.
The monks may then unwind a small length of thread that is held between the
hands of the assembled monks. They begin a series of recitations of Pali
scriptures intended to bring merit and blessings to the new couple. The string
terminates with the lead monk, who may connect it to a container of water that
will be 'sanctified' for the ceremony. Merit is said to travel through the
string and be conveyed to the water; a similar arrangement is used to transfer
merit to the dead at a funeral, further evidence of the weakening of the taboo
on mixing funerary imagery and trappings with marriage ceremonies. Blessed water
may be mixed with wax drippings from a candle lit before the Buddha image and
other ungents and herbs to create a 'paste' that is then applied to the
foreheads of the bride and groom to create a small 'dot', similar to the marking
sometimes made with red ochre on Hindu devotees. The bride's mark is created
with the butt end of the candle rather than the monk's thumb, in keeping with
the Vinaya prohibition against touching women.
The highest-ranking monk present may elect to say a few words to the couple,
offering advice or encouragement. The couple may then make offerings of food to
the monks, at which point the Buddhist portion of the ceremony is concluded.
The Thai dowry system is known as the 'Sin Sodt'. Traditionally, the groom will
be expected to pay a sum of money to the family, to compensate them and to
demonstrate that the groom is financially capable of taking care of their
daughter. Sometimes, this sum is purely symbolic, and will be returned to the
bride and groom after the wedding has taken place.
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